First, I would like to thank Western media, and the mean boys and girls who buy into the hype, about what is and isn’t acceptable in the size/shape of the human body. Thank you for force-feeding us the idea that 99% of us should strive to look like the 1% that you deem beautiful, and thus worthy of love and affection.
Here is a recent picture my daughter posted to Facebook (I apologize. I have no idea where the photo came from, and who to give photo credit to). This picture was so emotional for me, I had to give it the space it deserves.
Post continues below picture.
Every woman who saw this picture was moved by it. I remember being this age and feeling this way. “Why don’t I look like the girls in the magazines and on TV?” We’re being spoon-fed a monstrous idea that we should all be a “perfect” size 2, a svelte 5’11”, a perfectly styled and coiffed woman, or we are simply not worthy of love or even respect.
Here’s the thing. We are all part of the same make-up within the Universe. We are all connected to the same “Source Energy”. This means we are all a “Spark of the Divine”. Essentially, we are all a piece of God, and unless you’re part of a belief system that ascribes hate to your God, you CANNOT hate the you that is God.
So how do we teach self-love in a world with 24-hour television, smartphones and social media?
I don’t have all the answers to that. Like you, I’m only a piece of God and not All-Knowing, but I have some ideas. First, the adults in children’s lives need to recognize the problem. Recognizing there is a problem is the first step to fixing it.
We must instill the idea of self-respect and love when our children are very, VERY young. As adults, we must be the example. Sadly, my writing this comes from a place of hindsight (some might even consider it a place of hypocrisy). As a mother of 3 children – two daughters – I was not a good example in their early childhood. I allowed myself to be victimized, and I set a precedent of self-disrespect and self-hate. My daughters would catch me looking in the mirror, criticizing my every perceived flaw, and I didn’t realize my self-loathing was hurting them (ignorance sucks).
Now they do it, and as a mother, it tears my heart out. In my eyes, my children are perfect, and when they were born, they never had a doubt they were anything but perfection. Children are not born critical, cynical and judgmental. These are learned behaviors picked up from exposure to those things.
If you love and accept yourself enough, you will be in a beautiful cycle where you also treat yourself with love and respect; thus becoming more lovely. It will show to the rest of the world world. You will find that you are likely treated with more love and respect by others (but only if they, too, are on the path of self-love and respect), and harsh judgments will be ineffectual. When you love yourself enough, you can’t be sidetracked by the ignorant (the me of years past).
If you saw the film “What the BLEEP Do We Know?!”, you will recognize this picture. If you haven’t seen it, I don’t want to be the SPOILER, but suffice it to say, the woman goes from a place of self-hate to self-love, and her journey is eye-opening and nothing short of amazing. I highly recommend this movie to EVERYONE – especially if you find yourself being critical of your personal God/dess. When we are critical and disrespectful to ourselves, that tends to also bleed over into all of our relationships, putting us in a cycle of negativity. Cliché as it is, if you want love and respect, it must first come from within. The adults in mediaworld should be sensationalizing THAT concept instead of one-small-size-fits-all-or-you’re-not-worthy idea.
Let’s make this world a better place. Start with you, and let that love and respect expand and touch everybody you meet.